1. Establish an appropriate support system for the kids, through peers, extended family, school counselors and teachers.
  2. Each parent should get their own support system…parents should not rely on their children for emotional support at this time, it is too much of an emotional burden on the children.
  3. Keep stability in the children’s lives. Try and maintain consistent discipline between the 2 households and maintain daily routines.
  4. Promote strong sibling relationships- no one knows better what a child is going through then the other children experiencing the same thing.
  5. Promote and encourage a good relationship between the kids and the other parent.
  6. Create “Time-In,” a half-hour to an hour of quality time with your kids each day.
  7. Answer your kids’ questions about your divorce in an appropriate manner, considering their age, maturity, and the content of the question. Use children’s books if necessary, they might help your children understand better.
  8. Discuss developments in the divorce as they arise, again, in an appropriate manner.
  9. Become informed: read divorce related literature.
  10. Seek help from a mental health professional, if necessary.

Firpi, Miquel A., Wenger, Andrew. “The High-Conflict Family: What Ongoing Fighting Means for Your Children,” The Family Advocate, Summer 2004 Vol. 27, No. 1. p. 34.